Greetings folks,
It has occured to me that I haven't updated you guys on what is going in the IC in a while, and after all it definitely is a portion of what this blog is, so I guess I should do that...nothing. Still, so don't think you're missing out on anything. Most interesting thing to happen was a flash mob, but I won't go into more detail, because the cons far outweighed the pros on that one.
One may ask what do I do here at work to pass time, other than this blog? That is a good question and thank you for asking. Truth is, I really don't do much. I guess I take a walk around the floor every hour or so, but with no real intention in mind, push some chairs, pick up some trash after real filthy people.
You would think I get a lot of homework done too, but truth is I have my nights with it. Either I'm just not in the mood, which is usually the nights I have insane amount of homework or I'm very much so in the mood and I have none. Regardless, I don't like doing homework ever, but I do find it useful for getting ahead on homework more so then completing it. I like to start homework but just getting stuff down on a page feels better than nothing, so its usually shit but my thought process is "I can technically turn this in right now if I had to." I never do, I go back later and fix it, but its good to get the rough cut out of the way here.
More so, I bet you're wondering what I do on the internet. Well, contrary to popular belief there are things out there other than Facebook to kill time. I don't want to pull a Tuna and let my well-known fact about me be that I'm "awesome at Facebook." I enjoy it just fine, but I don't need it to be life. Twitter is great, but you go through that pretty quickly when you weave out the shitty tweets, and you then you realize no one you are following is tweeting at this hour so it dies pretty quickly.
Even though I hate to admit it, Reddit is a pretty good sight. If you are bored, it's so heavily updated that its practically impossible to get bored on that site. I mostly stick to the "pics" and "funny" categories, because both take little thought to understand. Now, I don't want to be known as a Redditor though, I don't want to be them. It's creepy like a cult is creepy, they just love when they are out in the real world and see something having to do with Reddit and than get this Reddit-Rager on and think its the most interesting thing ever. Now this shit with Memes and "Shit people say..." has taken over the internet faster than that "Two Girls, One Cup" video, and personally I'd take the latter. I find it more entertaining and a lot easier to stomach, which I think says a lot about me...
Reddit has given me topics for this blog, so I thank it for that. But more so than anything else in the world that Reddit has done for me is THIS. Please click it, and I dare you to not finish the whole thing. They are so much fun and I find my self laughing like Ron "F******" Swanson the entire time I'm doing it, which by far has to be the best laugh to personality combination in the history of television, ever.
Here's a list of some other websites I like to visit:
I Watch Stuff (Scott Zimmerman)
This is Why I'm Broke (reddit)- I feel like I need it, and without it, I'm not enough.
Pearls Before Swine - Not a huge comic guy, but I do like this one.
Geekologie -(Scott Zimmerman)
Is it Christmas? - (Eric, Sean, and Ryan aka CVS Apartment), not to ruin the surprise, but apparently No, it's not christmas. I don't know how long that'll last though, so you should check back tomorrow.
Some E-Cards -These are always great.
Sporcle- just a classic time waster.
Text Twist - You know I love my jumbles, WHAT?!
And of course my king of websites forever and ever and ever
I.M.D. MOTHER FLIPPIN B
Also, I would just like to say to any of you Scrubs fans out there who are still in straight denial about how that show ended, I direct you towards Psych. Because that show makes me giggle in only that special way Scrubs could, and Parks and Rec is moving into that slot too.
Don't Frug with Drugs!
Night, Nite, Knight,
Jarrad
Friday, February 10, 2012
Monday, February 6, 2012
iStrain
Greetings,
As I sit here staring at a computer screen for the 90th straight hour, I feel as if I should warn you all my eyes have started to bleed, and I can no longer recognize the color blue. Working on a computer is pretty bad for your eyes apparently, especially when you do it in excess. Now, I spend my entire time on the computer while at work, because that is our toy to use while we work. I even read on the computer, because I'm greeneco-friendly and I find it important not to waste paper, even though I do so on many occasions in fact waste paper. I've been known to dabble with some doodles from time to time.
Regardless, the amount of time I am staring at screen that is lit and burning holes into the back of my eyes, black holes where dreams go to die, is starting to become a bit of an issue.
This weekend including right now, I spent roughly 26.5 hours just staring at computer screen doing work (its actually pretty close to that I just did the math). That is an entire day, not including at home computer usage or television. Round that up, its about 32 hours of illuminated screens blinding me slowly. This is dangerous. I have good vision...had. I can already start to feel the eye strain, and after watching 50/50 I've become an honorary hypochondriac. I say "honorary" because it makes it sound less pathetic, just throw that word in front of anything you do that makes you feel pathetic, and boom! instantaneously better.
Speaking of pathetic, do you know what its like to take 35 pictures on a film camera only to find out later, there was no film in the camera...Cause I recently was introduced to this feeling. I don't want to get into the details, but I bet you're asking "How do you forget to put the film in the camera?" Well, I didn't, I was misinformed. It was going to happen regardless, because there was no way for me to check without ruining the film or lack there of.
Anyway, back to problem at hand blinding oneself. If I do end up blinding myself it better be in a lot cooler way than staring at a screen too long. Oedipus had the right idea, although his reasons were far more disgusting for doing it and I don't condone his actions leading up to that, don't be mistaken. Still, he blinded himself using his mom/wife's brooches. Not my first weapon of choice, but I guess it does the job. I'm thinking machete or ice pick, either or, I'm not real "picky"... :-] :-) :-}. That is my gradual small smile to large smile emoticon train, I've trademarked it, so if you use it, I want credit.
I think or order to save my eyes, I need to start going outside more and looking at things that don't make my eyes want to burst into flames, things that are pretty and "easy on the eyes." I am currently having massive eye strain and can feel my heart beat in right eye, I don't think that's a good sign.
So after you read this post of course, I ask that you get off the computer and go outside. Because maybe...just maybe, we can end child obesity together! I bet you didn't think I was going there, truthfully I had no idea I was going there.
Honestly though, its sort fucked up we have child obesity problems here, where in Africa they have child malnutrition problems? My suggestion lets do the ultimate house swap, but instead we do Country Swap. Only about a month, that would probably even 'em out. Just think about it.
Anyone else catch this in the new Avengers trailer? The arrows are pointing to Progressive Field formerly known as Jacobs Field, where the Indians play, Cleveland Indians that is...Cleveland Bitches!
Now, I have to leave you so I can write a paper about the ever so interesting Heart of Darkness. Short story my ass, it's 60 pages long. Short stories should have a max of 10, and even that's pushing it.
Last but not least, Nello D. I know I may have hurt you last post but, We've been together since way back when. Sometimes I never want to see you again. But I want you to know, after all these year. You're still the one I want whisperin' in my ear .You're still the one I want to talk to in bed.
Still the one that turns my head. We're still having fun, and you're still the one
Night, Nite, Knight,
Jarrad
As I sit here staring at a computer screen for the 90th straight hour, I feel as if I should warn you all my eyes have started to bleed, and I can no longer recognize the color blue. Working on a computer is pretty bad for your eyes apparently, especially when you do it in excess. Now, I spend my entire time on the computer while at work, because that is our toy to use while we work. I even read on the computer, because I'm greeneco-friendly and I find it important not to waste paper, even though I do so on many occasions in fact waste paper. I've been known to dabble with some doodles from time to time.
Regardless, the amount of time I am staring at screen that is lit and burning holes into the back of my eyes, black holes where dreams go to die, is starting to become a bit of an issue.
This weekend including right now, I spent roughly 26.5 hours just staring at computer screen doing work (its actually pretty close to that I just did the math). That is an entire day, not including at home computer usage or television. Round that up, its about 32 hours of illuminated screens blinding me slowly. This is dangerous. I have good vision...had. I can already start to feel the eye strain, and after watching 50/50 I've become an honorary hypochondriac. I say "honorary" because it makes it sound less pathetic, just throw that word in front of anything you do that makes you feel pathetic, and boom! instantaneously better.
Speaking of pathetic, do you know what its like to take 35 pictures on a film camera only to find out later, there was no film in the camera...Cause I recently was introduced to this feeling. I don't want to get into the details, but I bet you're asking "How do you forget to put the film in the camera?" Well, I didn't, I was misinformed. It was going to happen regardless, because there was no way for me to check without ruining the film or lack there of.
Anyway, back to problem at hand blinding oneself. If I do end up blinding myself it better be in a lot cooler way than staring at a screen too long. Oedipus had the right idea, although his reasons were far more disgusting for doing it and I don't condone his actions leading up to that, don't be mistaken. Still, he blinded himself using his mom/wife's brooches. Not my first weapon of choice, but I guess it does the job. I'm thinking machete or ice pick, either or, I'm not real "picky"... :-] :-) :-}. That is my gradual small smile to large smile emoticon train, I've trademarked it, so if you use it, I want credit.
I think or order to save my eyes, I need to start going outside more and looking at things that don't make my eyes want to burst into flames, things that are pretty and "easy on the eyes." I am currently having massive eye strain and can feel my heart beat in right eye, I don't think that's a good sign.
So after you read this post of course, I ask that you get off the computer and go outside. Because maybe...just maybe, we can end child obesity together! I bet you didn't think I was going there, truthfully I had no idea I was going there.
Honestly though, its sort fucked up we have child obesity problems here, where in Africa they have child malnutrition problems? My suggestion lets do the ultimate house swap, but instead we do Country Swap. Only about a month, that would probably even 'em out. Just think about it.
Now, I have to leave you so I can write a paper about the ever so interesting Heart of Darkness. Short story my ass, it's 60 pages long. Short stories should have a max of 10, and even that's pushing it.
Last but not least, Nello D. I know I may have hurt you last post but, We've been together since way back when. Sometimes I never want to see you again. But I want you to know, after all these year. You're still the one I want whisperin' in my ear .You're still the one I want to talk to in bed.
Still the one that turns my head. We're still having fun, and you're still the one
Night, Nite, Knight,
Jarrad
Friday, February 3, 2012
That was Then, This is Now.
"Hello friend,"
That is my first ever Little Bill reference. Proud to share it with the rest of you. As I do so many other things. Little Bill was a decent show, no Rupert, Gullah Gullah Island, or even Babar but it had its place in history.
Back then, Television was a lot better...life was a lot better, but for the sake of limitations we'll stick to just TV right now. Nickelodeon use to rule our house's TV, with Disney and Cartoon Network being close behind. Show after show was quality. Someone once told me that the original cast of All That is better than the cast of SNL now, and although I don't know if that's completely true, I would say they could be make a strong argument. Those of you kids who didn't have cable...Nello D, August, that sucks because you missed out on quality brain loss and mindless stupidity that I will forever remember.
Not even talking about kid networks, MTV used to actually be Music Television, with a strong emphasis on the Music part. How often do you turn it to that channel and music is not on it. My guess would be 95% of the time. MTV is now riddled with teenage mothers, people with weird addictions, and heavily intoxicated "celebrities." I remember sneaking into the living room late at night, so I could watch MTV Cancun with my brother, yea it was sleazy and disgusting, but it was the coolest thing you could see when you were that age. Beavis and Butthead recently came back, and though still hilarious, it has completely revamped its style. They don't really talk about music videos anymore, but instead the plague which is reality televison.
This new movie coming out from the wonderful creators over at Magnet have recently released a brand new trailer for God Bless America. Directed and written by Police Academy veteran, Bobcat Goldthwait, which if you can't remember who that is, because you're getting him confused with all the other Bobcats you know, he's the guy who constantly sounds like someone is twisting his nuts with a pair of pliers.
Magnet is known for making some blatantly obvious movies, and by that I mean their plots are usually the similar to the ideas a group of heroin addicts sitting around a table would pitch for movie ideas. They actually take these ideas and make them reality, but in a fantastically awesome way. They are our deepest, most secretive, evil thoughts and desires put into a movie. Just check out Hobo with a Shotgun, Rubber, or Troll Hunter if you don't believe me.
Although this movie does seem pretty over the top and ridiculous, it sort makes every person realize what that shitty feeling in the bottom of their stomach is every time they turn on the TV, that feeling that grew once people like Kim Kardashian and Heidi Montag became celebrities for doing nothing. Jersey Shore is hilarious, but not because of funny humor, but because its so sad how that's how far we've fallen, that tears don't even do it justice, we have to laugh at how pathetic it is. It seems like we went from wanting to like people on TV, to enjoy hating people on TV.
Granted I'm not saying all TV is bad, because its not. I'm a TV junkie still, there are so many good shows on now like Parks and Rec, 30 Rock, Modern Family, Daily Show, etc. These shows know what it means to be good, they don't need cheap, trashy gimmicks. As long as these networks like Showtime and HBO continue to birth out these unbelievable shows, I think we'll be just fine. There is a black hole though in the Television world, and I think we need to do something about, like kill it, just shoot in the freaking face and watch it die slowly.
Our TV idols went from Nick Jr's Face to Simon Cowell, from Stick Stickley to Ryan Seacrest (which I think the two bare a striking resemblance), regardless our idols have been realized and it turned out to be a lot more sad than any of us expected.
I know reality TV is cheaper, but truth is I'd rather watch reruns of Everwood for the rest of my life than sit through one more Bachelor commercial. No one cares, they never get married and if they do, they will get a divorce or just cheat on each other the rest of their lives.
Reruns are more original than reality TV.
Also, we put up our official casting call, so here it is for our movie...This is the only place I can think to post it.
http://chicago.craigslist.org/chc/tlg/2831641767.html
Danny Fortuna, I just want to say you are my sunshine, my only sunshine... You make me happy when skies are gray... You never know dear, how much I love you. Please don't take my sunshine away.
Night, Nite, Knight,
Jarrad
That is my first ever Little Bill reference. Proud to share it with the rest of you. As I do so many other things. Little Bill was a decent show, no Rupert, Gullah Gullah Island, or even Babar but it had its place in history.
Back then, Television was a lot better...life was a lot better, but for the sake of limitations we'll stick to just TV right now. Nickelodeon use to rule our house's TV, with Disney and Cartoon Network being close behind. Show after show was quality. Someone once told me that the original cast of All That is better than the cast of SNL now, and although I don't know if that's completely true, I would say they could be make a strong argument. Those of you kids who didn't have cable...Nello D, August, that sucks because you missed out on quality brain loss and mindless stupidity that I will forever remember.
Not even talking about kid networks, MTV used to actually be Music Television, with a strong emphasis on the Music part. How often do you turn it to that channel and music is not on it. My guess would be 95% of the time. MTV is now riddled with teenage mothers, people with weird addictions, and heavily intoxicated "celebrities." I remember sneaking into the living room late at night, so I could watch MTV Cancun with my brother, yea it was sleazy and disgusting, but it was the coolest thing you could see when you were that age. Beavis and Butthead recently came back, and though still hilarious, it has completely revamped its style. They don't really talk about music videos anymore, but instead the plague which is reality televison.
This new movie coming out from the wonderful creators over at Magnet have recently released a brand new trailer for God Bless America. Directed and written by Police Academy veteran, Bobcat Goldthwait, which if you can't remember who that is, because you're getting him confused with all the other Bobcats you know, he's the guy who constantly sounds like someone is twisting his nuts with a pair of pliers.
Magnet is known for making some blatantly obvious movies, and by that I mean their plots are usually the similar to the ideas a group of heroin addicts sitting around a table would pitch for movie ideas. They actually take these ideas and make them reality, but in a fantastically awesome way. They are our deepest, most secretive, evil thoughts and desires put into a movie. Just check out Hobo with a Shotgun, Rubber, or Troll Hunter if you don't believe me.
Although this movie does seem pretty over the top and ridiculous, it sort makes every person realize what that shitty feeling in the bottom of their stomach is every time they turn on the TV, that feeling that grew once people like Kim Kardashian and Heidi Montag became celebrities for doing nothing. Jersey Shore is hilarious, but not because of funny humor, but because its so sad how that's how far we've fallen, that tears don't even do it justice, we have to laugh at how pathetic it is. It seems like we went from wanting to like people on TV, to enjoy hating people on TV.
Granted I'm not saying all TV is bad, because its not. I'm a TV junkie still, there are so many good shows on now like Parks and Rec, 30 Rock, Modern Family, Daily Show, etc. These shows know what it means to be good, they don't need cheap, trashy gimmicks. As long as these networks like Showtime and HBO continue to birth out these unbelievable shows, I think we'll be just fine. There is a black hole though in the Television world, and I think we need to do something about, like kill it, just shoot in the freaking face and watch it die slowly.
Our TV idols went from Nick Jr's Face to Simon Cowell, from Stick Stickley to Ryan Seacrest (which I think the two bare a striking resemblance), regardless our idols have been realized and it turned out to be a lot more sad than any of us expected.
I know reality TV is cheaper, but truth is I'd rather watch reruns of Everwood for the rest of my life than sit through one more Bachelor commercial. No one cares, they never get married and if they do, they will get a divorce or just cheat on each other the rest of their lives.
Reruns are more original than reality TV.
Also, we put up our official casting call, so here it is for our movie...This is the only place I can think to post it.
http://chicago.craigslist.org/chc/tlg/2831641767.html
Danny Fortuna, I just want to say you are my sunshine, my only sunshine... You make me happy when skies are gray... You never know dear, how much I love you. Please don't take my sunshine away.
Night, Nite, Knight,
Jarrad
Monday, January 30, 2012
No Title Shall be Given.
Hello,
I warn you, tonight's post will not be long. I can't put together a thought long enough to even comprehend what it may mean someday, somewhere, in the space vortex of time in relation to the third black world of the Harkan Z, right across from the Pylithosion galaxy. For that matter bring together the words to describe such a place relevant to life on earth as it is in vast space of yours, theirs, and hers universe...
Nothing right now makes sense to me, I'm not sad, just confused with every little thing around me. The only thing I can think about is how I have to get up tomorrow at 11:30 to go to class at 12:30, cause I need an hour to prepare.
I have no real topic to speak of tonight. Tonight will be a lot of staring off into objects that really have no business being stared at for more than a second or two, pillars for example or shelf decoration. This week will not be fun for doing work mainly because I don't have any books yet for any of my classes, and its sort of a requirement that I get those and then use those to do my work...go figure.
I've had a lot on mind lately, but no one thing, just an assortment of bullshit. On top of that, I've been watching that show Shameless a lot, which could be one of the funniest/ most depressing shows of all time. I recommend watching it, but do it in doses and not if you're already feeling pretty shitty. Probably not a great show to watch when you're already stressed. On a brighter note if you like to have your occasional fetal position cry session in the shower, than I think this could be quite rewarding for you... not like I would know.
So instead of a long drawn out post, I'm just going to leave you with a few things that I think about on a fairly regular basis. If I've ever said any of these to any of you before sorry, but they are still fascinating to me and I still have so many questions about them. They're not all winners (none of them are), but they require some attention.
First off, The sun is really hot. So much so that its millions of miles away from us, yet when we go in the shade its cold and when we step into the sunlight it gets warm. That is power. Secondly, I bet vegetarians would be the first ones to eat a human being if they were starving for food and on a deserted island, because my guess is that they get hungry more often than people that eat meat. Plus, you know they aren't going to eat another vegetarian first, because they are probably not very tasty, real boney. Also, Ticonderoga pencils are clearly the best wooden pencil ever made. Why? what is that they do that makes their pencils so good. Better yet, why haven't others capitalized on this? Do they not know either?
Just some things to think about, I'm not really looking for answers. The wonder comes in never knowing. Be aware of the known be amazed by the unknown. That's my motto that I just made up right here on the spot, but I think I'm going to keep it because I feel it makes a lot sense.
Have a good night, day, week, whatever else you want to be good.
Night, Nite, Knight,
Jarrad
I warn you, tonight's post will not be long. I can't put together a thought long enough to even comprehend what it may mean someday, somewhere, in the space vortex of time in relation to the third black world of the Harkan Z, right across from the Pylithosion galaxy. For that matter bring together the words to describe such a place relevant to life on earth as it is in vast space of yours, theirs, and hers universe...
Nothing right now makes sense to me, I'm not sad, just confused with every little thing around me. The only thing I can think about is how I have to get up tomorrow at 11:30 to go to class at 12:30, cause I need an hour to prepare.
I have no real topic to speak of tonight. Tonight will be a lot of staring off into objects that really have no business being stared at for more than a second or two, pillars for example or shelf decoration. This week will not be fun for doing work mainly because I don't have any books yet for any of my classes, and its sort of a requirement that I get those and then use those to do my work...go figure.
I've had a lot on mind lately, but no one thing, just an assortment of bullshit. On top of that, I've been watching that show Shameless a lot, which could be one of the funniest/ most depressing shows of all time. I recommend watching it, but do it in doses and not if you're already feeling pretty shitty. Probably not a great show to watch when you're already stressed. On a brighter note if you like to have your occasional fetal position cry session in the shower, than I think this could be quite rewarding for you... not like I would know.
So instead of a long drawn out post, I'm just going to leave you with a few things that I think about on a fairly regular basis. If I've ever said any of these to any of you before sorry, but they are still fascinating to me and I still have so many questions about them. They're not all winners (none of them are), but they require some attention.
First off, The sun is really hot. So much so that its millions of miles away from us, yet when we go in the shade its cold and when we step into the sunlight it gets warm. That is power. Secondly, I bet vegetarians would be the first ones to eat a human being if they were starving for food and on a deserted island, because my guess is that they get hungry more often than people that eat meat. Plus, you know they aren't going to eat another vegetarian first, because they are probably not very tasty, real boney. Also, Ticonderoga pencils are clearly the best wooden pencil ever made. Why? what is that they do that makes their pencils so good. Better yet, why haven't others capitalized on this? Do they not know either?
Just some things to think about, I'm not really looking for answers. The wonder comes in never knowing. Be aware of the known be amazed by the unknown. That's my motto that I just made up right here on the spot, but I think I'm going to keep it because I feel it makes a lot sense.
Have a good night, day, week, whatever else you want to be good.
Night, Nite, Knight,
Jarrad
Friday, January 27, 2012
That Wasn't Me...
Greetings all,
Tonight, I had night class at our downtown campus and afterwards I wanted to get dinner. Mainly because the food options downtown are far better than anything we have up north. Seriously, there is two of everything (McDonald's, Dunkin Donuts, Subway), yet most of the time I don't even want one of them.
In class we were talking about Flaccos Tacos, which is right by the downtown campus if you didn't know and they make some pretty good food, so that's what I was feeling at the time. The entirety of the time after class I was arguing back and forth with myself if I was really that hungry or should I just go home, but the shuttle wasn't leaving for a long time, but maybe I should take the L...I was being pretty indecisive on all counts.
Anyway, I walk up to Flaccos and the door is closed, and when I went to go push it open, it didn't...There were people inside who clearly saw me fail at this, and the place was definitely still open. So instead of acting like a human who just got door rejected and try and figure out how to open it, I just turned around and walked into Jimmie Johns which is located just opposite of Flaccos. Because walking out was not an option. Clearly, I had walked into the building to get food, but I thought maybe people would just think I changed my mind and wanted Jimmie Johns instead. Well there I was in Jimmie Johns and already ordered a sandwich. Mind you, This all happened so quickly that I didn't even realize that I had ordered anything until he told me the total.
After I paid, I looked out the door to the front door of Flaccos (still closed) and watch this what-had-to-be a 6 year old girl do the same thing I did. Except instead of running away like an embarrassed little coward she looked down at the handle, applied 6-year-old logic, and used the door knob to open it...Oh the amount of failing that I did within the span of one minute literally had to set a new record for all time patheticness. It was a new low, which is saying something.
Not only was I not clever enough to figure how to open a door, but I got to watch a 6 year old do what I could not, on top of letting my crippling fear of being embarrassed in front complete strangers overcome my desire for tacos. Also, lets not mention the fact that I live within a one block radius of Jimmie Johns up north and was one of the places that I could have just gone when I got home. So I threw that shitty sandwich in my backpack, dropped my head, and ran out of that place hoping to plant the idea that I "may have been in a hurry" in people's heads.
No one thought this or is even capable of that level of deduction of a stranger, this is my own insecurity. The only person who would have made all the connections that I just made, is me. We are all the same way, we are far harsher critics of ourselves than others. I'm super awkward at times, and have some pretty horrible awkward moments. Regardless of what you may think, a persons awkwardness isn't measured by the amount awkward things they do, but about how often they get caught doing them.
For example. We all have stairs, I assume, or have access to stairs, or climbed them at least one time in our lives. Well, anytime I find myself alone on a staircase my first instinct is to run, and that means go animal! Use all four limbs to get up those stairs as fast as "humanly" possible. Never in your life do you realize how ridiculous you look until you're running up several flights of stairs only to reason that a professor had just witnessed you struggle up the last one. That is a look I wish to forget, I still see him around campus and I'm pretty sure he cracks a pity smile my way...(sigh).
Better yet, have you ever been walking somewhere and then realize you're going the wrong direction so you have to back track yet there are so many people around you know someone's gonna noticed you screwed up. That happens pretty much daily, I've literally walked completely out of my way so I can loop and head back in the right direction, so I can "smoothly" get back on the right track, and filter through enough people that no one is gonna notice.
I ordered a pizza last week and when the guy said "enjoy your food" I replied with a "you too!" I wish I could learn from that mistake, but I tend to be a multiple offender of that awkward moment. It wouldn't be as bad, if I didn't sound like a little giddy fat kid who's to excited about food to think about anything else that's going on around him.
Talking to yourself. I do this pretty much everyday and I know it runs in my family, because I've definitely caught some of them in that awkward moment. Hehe losers.
If you've ever been caught talking to yourself you need to understand there was no way out of it until recently. Contrary to popular belief, the Bluetooth headset was not made to prevent cell-phone radiation or reckless driving, it was invented as a scape goat for the awkward moment of being caught talking to yourself. I swear it works, or at least it will make you think it works. Anytime you get caught talking to yourself by a stranger (that's important because people who know you will call bullshit immediately) just throw your hand up to your ear and pretend like your adjusting your "ear piece." Turn that ear away from them so they can't see you pathetically trying to save your dignity. It's not full proof, but its better than anything else that's out there.
The best piece of recovery for any of these awkward moments, if blatantly caught, is to just laugh at yourself and keep walking, but that tends to not work in my favor as much as I hope it would. Still it will happens to everyone, and in that respect please don't sacrifice what you really want for a recovery because then you get to watch a 6-year-old out-smart you, and a sandwich that you went out of your way avoid having to eat.
I would also like to say, that regardless of all the failing that I did tonight, I got to ride back on the L with my favorite Knight shift regular, Michael Heisler. He is in here probably more than I am, and I'm glad I've only seen him outside of these ungodly hours because that means school isn't that demanding yet this semester. I'm sure he'll return soon...sorry man.
Anyway that is all for tonight, if your awkward don't get caught, if you get caught you will be labeled as such. That's just something that's gonna happen.
Also, This is one of my dearest, most lovable friends, Mat, and he's making his senior movie. Donate if you can, anything would help. If not shower him with hugs, kisses, and compliments, because who wouldn't love that? He's a brilliant guy and sure knows his shit, probes (def) better than I do.
Taste of You (Click it, I dare ya)
Night, Nite, Knight,
Jarrad
Tonight, I had night class at our downtown campus and afterwards I wanted to get dinner. Mainly because the food options downtown are far better than anything we have up north. Seriously, there is two of everything (McDonald's, Dunkin Donuts, Subway), yet most of the time I don't even want one of them.
In class we were talking about Flaccos Tacos, which is right by the downtown campus if you didn't know and they make some pretty good food, so that's what I was feeling at the time. The entirety of the time after class I was arguing back and forth with myself if I was really that hungry or should I just go home, but the shuttle wasn't leaving for a long time, but maybe I should take the L...I was being pretty indecisive on all counts.
Anyway, I walk up to Flaccos and the door is closed, and when I went to go push it open, it didn't...There were people inside who clearly saw me fail at this, and the place was definitely still open. So instead of acting like a human who just got door rejected and try and figure out how to open it, I just turned around and walked into Jimmie Johns which is located just opposite of Flaccos. Because walking out was not an option. Clearly, I had walked into the building to get food, but I thought maybe people would just think I changed my mind and wanted Jimmie Johns instead. Well there I was in Jimmie Johns and already ordered a sandwich. Mind you, This all happened so quickly that I didn't even realize that I had ordered anything until he told me the total.
After I paid, I looked out the door to the front door of Flaccos (still closed) and watch this what-had-to-be a 6 year old girl do the same thing I did. Except instead of running away like an embarrassed little coward she looked down at the handle, applied 6-year-old logic, and used the door knob to open it...Oh the amount of failing that I did within the span of one minute literally had to set a new record for all time patheticness. It was a new low, which is saying something.
Not only was I not clever enough to figure how to open a door, but I got to watch a 6 year old do what I could not, on top of letting my crippling fear of being embarrassed in front complete strangers overcome my desire for tacos. Also, lets not mention the fact that I live within a one block radius of Jimmie Johns up north and was one of the places that I could have just gone when I got home. So I threw that shitty sandwich in my backpack, dropped my head, and ran out of that place hoping to plant the idea that I "may have been in a hurry" in people's heads.
No one thought this or is even capable of that level of deduction of a stranger, this is my own insecurity. The only person who would have made all the connections that I just made, is me. We are all the same way, we are far harsher critics of ourselves than others. I'm super awkward at times, and have some pretty horrible awkward moments. Regardless of what you may think, a persons awkwardness isn't measured by the amount awkward things they do, but about how often they get caught doing them.
For example. We all have stairs, I assume, or have access to stairs, or climbed them at least one time in our lives. Well, anytime I find myself alone on a staircase my first instinct is to run, and that means go animal! Use all four limbs to get up those stairs as fast as "humanly" possible. Never in your life do you realize how ridiculous you look until you're running up several flights of stairs only to reason that a professor had just witnessed you struggle up the last one. That is a look I wish to forget, I still see him around campus and I'm pretty sure he cracks a pity smile my way...(sigh).
Better yet, have you ever been walking somewhere and then realize you're going the wrong direction so you have to back track yet there are so many people around you know someone's gonna noticed you screwed up. That happens pretty much daily, I've literally walked completely out of my way so I can loop and head back in the right direction, so I can "smoothly" get back on the right track, and filter through enough people that no one is gonna notice.
I ordered a pizza last week and when the guy said "enjoy your food" I replied with a "you too!" I wish I could learn from that mistake, but I tend to be a multiple offender of that awkward moment. It wouldn't be as bad, if I didn't sound like a little giddy fat kid who's to excited about food to think about anything else that's going on around him.
Talking to yourself. I do this pretty much everyday and I know it runs in my family, because I've definitely caught some of them in that awkward moment. Hehe losers.
If you've ever been caught talking to yourself you need to understand there was no way out of it until recently. Contrary to popular belief, the Bluetooth headset was not made to prevent cell-phone radiation or reckless driving, it was invented as a scape goat for the awkward moment of being caught talking to yourself. I swear it works, or at least it will make you think it works. Anytime you get caught talking to yourself by a stranger (that's important because people who know you will call bullshit immediately) just throw your hand up to your ear and pretend like your adjusting your "ear piece." Turn that ear away from them so they can't see you pathetically trying to save your dignity. It's not full proof, but its better than anything else that's out there.
The best piece of recovery for any of these awkward moments, if blatantly caught, is to just laugh at yourself and keep walking, but that tends to not work in my favor as much as I hope it would. Still it will happens to everyone, and in that respect please don't sacrifice what you really want for a recovery because then you get to watch a 6-year-old out-smart you, and a sandwich that you went out of your way avoid having to eat.
I would also like to say, that regardless of all the failing that I did tonight, I got to ride back on the L with my favorite Knight shift regular, Michael Heisler. He is in here probably more than I am, and I'm glad I've only seen him outside of these ungodly hours because that means school isn't that demanding yet this semester. I'm sure he'll return soon...sorry man.
Anyway that is all for tonight, if your awkward don't get caught, if you get caught you will be labeled as such. That's just something that's gonna happen.
Also, This is one of my dearest, most lovable friends, Mat, and he's making his senior movie. Donate if you can, anything would help. If not shower him with hugs, kisses, and compliments, because who wouldn't love that? He's a brilliant guy and sure knows his shit, probes (def) better than I do.
Taste of You (Click it, I dare ya)
Night, Nite, Knight,
Jarrad
Monday, January 23, 2012
Dream While You Still Can
Hello,
When I was growing up I varied pretty drastically on what I wanted to be. It was never anything to typical, but more so just described aspects about me and my personality. At first, I remember I wanted to be a spy, probably because it was the most "realistic" job once I realized that Power Ranger was not a viable option. Also, I enjoyed making gadgets, I specifically remember using a burger-king toy reflector, a hand-powered helicopter, and a multiplication table keyboard to try and talk to aliens. I think my mom use to question my sanity when I'd be behind our house at night looking up at the sky and talking into a reflector.
Anyway, I realized I loved food, so I wanted to be a cook. That was it though, I didn't want to make food for people I just wanted to make food and eat it, and somehow that was a job to me. I went through a small phase of wanting to be the world's greatest balloon artist. I liked to make people laugh so I wanted to be a stand-up comic. I'm fairly positive that that was the last thing I really hoped to be before I didn't know at all what I wanted to be.
The stereotypical answers were cowboy, professional athlete, rock star, astronaut, etc. but unfortunately these answers have been fading out for quite some time. I would hate to be a parent who had to tell their kid they can't be an astronaut because that profession pretty much doesn't exist anymore. All those other professions are really only occupied by the 1%, with the exception of cowboy, and let's face it not everyone is special. What constitutes a cowboy now is in no way what the original idea of what a cowboy was. The most famous cowboy of our generation was a talking toy, its hard to be taken seriously.
We don't take dreams as seriously as we use to, but now is the time to do it. Unemployment is crazy high right now, so why not follow your dream while its acceptable to be unemployed. Just say that real cliche line "This economy sucks," I'm pretty sure that justifies every choice these days and people will think you are all political and shit.
If you don't you may end up being the reporter that got the hot lead on "What?! Katy Perry unfollowing Russell Brand on Twitter!"... why is this news? Better yet, why were people paid to inform us of this? In order to be a journalist these days, I'm pretty sure you have to stick to conversational topics of prepubescent middle school girls.
Don't get me wrong, nothing makes me happier than actually having money in my account, and vice versa nothing makes sadder than not (I'm sad a lot). I figure at this point, no one job I get will skyrocket me into billions, better yet hundreds, realistically tens. Whatever I end up doing I will enjoy it...I have to. The only job I have had that I didn't like, I would quite often talk about "ending it" on a daily basis.
Let's stop being realistic, let's live in the fantasy, live in the dream. Just like in Inception, with far less complications, but equally, if not more so, attractive people. Cobb got the right idea, he just found a way to make money off of it, even though he was dickin' around in limbo way too long and went a little insane.
If you like it enough, you'll find a way to make money doing it. I understand the amount of gappin' holes that statement has, but I'm currently livin' in a dream right now because reality is currently not as good.
Be a dreamer, because I'm pretty sure that's what the Beatles always wanted for us. Apparently, Lennon wasn't the only one... and in the process don't be a dick because once again no one will like you.
Night, Nite, Knight,
Jarrad
When I was growing up I varied pretty drastically on what I wanted to be. It was never anything to typical, but more so just described aspects about me and my personality. At first, I remember I wanted to be a spy, probably because it was the most "realistic" job once I realized that Power Ranger was not a viable option. Also, I enjoyed making gadgets, I specifically remember using a burger-king toy reflector, a hand-powered helicopter, and a multiplication table keyboard to try and talk to aliens. I think my mom use to question my sanity when I'd be behind our house at night looking up at the sky and talking into a reflector.
Anyway, I realized I loved food, so I wanted to be a cook. That was it though, I didn't want to make food for people I just wanted to make food and eat it, and somehow that was a job to me. I went through a small phase of wanting to be the world's greatest balloon artist. I liked to make people laugh so I wanted to be a stand-up comic. I'm fairly positive that that was the last thing I really hoped to be before I didn't know at all what I wanted to be.
The stereotypical answers were cowboy, professional athlete, rock star, astronaut, etc. but unfortunately these answers have been fading out for quite some time. I would hate to be a parent who had to tell their kid they can't be an astronaut because that profession pretty much doesn't exist anymore. All those other professions are really only occupied by the 1%, with the exception of cowboy, and let's face it not everyone is special. What constitutes a cowboy now is in no way what the original idea of what a cowboy was. The most famous cowboy of our generation was a talking toy, its hard to be taken seriously.
We don't take dreams as seriously as we use to, but now is the time to do it. Unemployment is crazy high right now, so why not follow your dream while its acceptable to be unemployed. Just say that real cliche line "This economy sucks," I'm pretty sure that justifies every choice these days and people will think you are all political and shit.
If you don't you may end up being the reporter that got the hot lead on "What?! Katy Perry unfollowing Russell Brand on Twitter!"... why is this news? Better yet, why were people paid to inform us of this? In order to be a journalist these days, I'm pretty sure you have to stick to conversational topics of prepubescent middle school girls.
Don't get me wrong, nothing makes me happier than actually having money in my account, and vice versa nothing makes sadder than not (I'm sad a lot). I figure at this point, no one job I get will skyrocket me into billions, better yet hundreds, realistically tens. Whatever I end up doing I will enjoy it...I have to. The only job I have had that I didn't like, I would quite often talk about "ending it" on a daily basis.
Let's stop being realistic, let's live in the fantasy, live in the dream. Just like in Inception, with far less complications, but equally, if not more so, attractive people. Cobb got the right idea, he just found a way to make money off of it, even though he was dickin' around in limbo way too long and went a little insane.
If you like it enough, you'll find a way to make money doing it. I understand the amount of gappin' holes that statement has, but I'm currently livin' in a dream right now because reality is currently not as good.
Be a dreamer, because I'm pretty sure that's what the Beatles always wanted for us. Apparently, Lennon wasn't the only one... and in the process don't be a dick because once again no one will like you.
Night, Nite, Knight,
Jarrad
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Back to Blackout
Happy New Year everyone! Welcome to the first post of 2012.
Those of you wondering, break was ok, but way too long and although I'm back to in the swing of things once again, I sincerely don't want to start class. Today, was our first day and it went pretty smoothly. My schedule for this semester will be far more insane than expected so that should be fun.
As far as work goes, I've graduated to the 2nd Floor of the IC. I am now a higher rank, sort of, but its hard to tell because there has to be all of no one here to actually prove that. I don't understand why they have the IC open 24 hours the first week when no one would have enough work to actually have to pull an all nighter. Regardless, I am here once again protecting our glass castle from the treachery of destruction and inappropriateness, although now I'm doing it from a birds eye view. I'm technically the second line of defense after the first floor...sort of sad.
I look forward to continuing the Knight Shift this semester as we are all wandering down this road, that we call life. Is what we're doin'. It's good to know I have friends that will always stand by me...If you get that reference then I'm pretty sure that you are far beyond your years of wisdom. If not, look it up, and then continue to strive for excellence.
Tonight, is a special night as we head into the already wee hours of the morning on this fine day January 18th, 2012. I feel as if I've been blessed that these events have so sweetly fallen so close to my first posting of the new year. Those of you who don't pay attention to anything or anyone may not know about the anticipated Congress vote on the SOPA and PIPA Bills on Sunday. Websites like Wikipedia and Reddit have vowed a blackout protest today in their stance against these bills being passed. Don't worry though the saying, "Once you go black, you never go back" does not apply here, they will be back Thursday. (SOPA is apparently been benched like Community but not canceled, but PIPA is still on for Sunday...I think).
I'm not completely sure as to what exactly these bills mean, but I'm fairly positive many of our Congressmen do not either. From online protests, blog posts, and sites like Google, Wikipedia, and Reddit I have been informed that apparently our government is trying to put censors on our "open and free internet" ( The quotes aren't for sarcasm, those really aren't my words). From what I understand, this is their attempt at stoping piracy and other things dealing with copyright infringement.
I am one major fan of this country, as are many of you, but a government controlled internet does not seem like something I really want to get behind. You can go online right now and read about this if you want, and that,in so many ways, is the reason why the Internet is soo flippin' cool in the first place. It doesn't hold anything back, it is harsh, ridiculous, true, false, vulgar, insane, credible, stupid, smart, inappropriate, sexy, disgusting, sincere, sarcastic etc. all at the same time. It is not any one of these things because to define it as one would never do it justice, so we label it as free because it is open to all of these things and anything else that wants poke its freak little head into the circus that it is.
In our day and age, it is so much apart of us we can't help but feel completely lost without it. We can read things (like this blog :) ) at our will because we can write things at our will. It is a constant open forum of discussion and ideas that are constantly circling the web sparking more and more ideas and discussions to systematically make its way back to us. It keeps us connected on a global level, and always gives back way more than we can take.
I understand that these bills won't completely strip us of our online freedom, but what's to stop the another, more strict, bill from passing? As a citizen to the earth, nothing is ever good enough. Give us what we want, we want more. It is all shitty, and I don't think right now that the "internet problem" is really what our focus should be on... The world's gonna end in a year people. Shouldn't we be training a group of oil drillers to stop whatever is coming our way? Focusing more of our attention and resources towards that, because truth is the Internet is not gonna be all that great if we're all too dead to enjoy it.
They only had 18 days and a young Bruce Willis. Don't get me wrong, I know he's still got it, but I don't know for how much longer, so I think we could be bit ahead of the game if only we just realized it!!!
Anyway, I hope to God our government doesn't fail us, I hope that oil-drilling team full of rough necks and hillbillies can sober up long enough just before that clock hits zero, and even more so I hope this year is great for every single one of you.
It is good to be back.
Night, Nite, Knight,
Jarrad
Those of you wondering, break was ok, but way too long and although I'm back to in the swing of things once again, I sincerely don't want to start class. Today, was our first day and it went pretty smoothly. My schedule for this semester will be far more insane than expected so that should be fun.
As far as work goes, I've graduated to the 2nd Floor of the IC. I am now a higher rank, sort of, but its hard to tell because there has to be all of no one here to actually prove that. I don't understand why they have the IC open 24 hours the first week when no one would have enough work to actually have to pull an all nighter. Regardless, I am here once again protecting our glass castle from the treachery of destruction and inappropriateness, although now I'm doing it from a birds eye view. I'm technically the second line of defense after the first floor...sort of sad.
I look forward to continuing the Knight Shift this semester as we are all wandering down this road, that we call life. Is what we're doin'. It's good to know I have friends that will always stand by me...If you get that reference then I'm pretty sure that you are far beyond your years of wisdom. If not, look it up, and then continue to strive for excellence.
Tonight, is a special night as we head into the already wee hours of the morning on this fine day January 18th, 2012. I feel as if I've been blessed that these events have so sweetly fallen so close to my first posting of the new year. Those of you who don't pay attention to anything or anyone may not know about the anticipated Congress vote on the SOPA and PIPA Bills on Sunday. Websites like Wikipedia and Reddit have vowed a blackout protest today in their stance against these bills being passed. Don't worry though the saying, "Once you go black, you never go back" does not apply here, they will be back Thursday. (SOPA is apparently been benched like Community but not canceled, but PIPA is still on for Sunday...I think).
I'm not completely sure as to what exactly these bills mean, but I'm fairly positive many of our Congressmen do not either. From online protests, blog posts, and sites like Google, Wikipedia, and Reddit I have been informed that apparently our government is trying to put censors on our "open and free internet" ( The quotes aren't for sarcasm, those really aren't my words). From what I understand, this is their attempt at stoping piracy and other things dealing with copyright infringement.
I am one major fan of this country, as are many of you, but a government controlled internet does not seem like something I really want to get behind. You can go online right now and read about this if you want, and that,in so many ways, is the reason why the Internet is soo flippin' cool in the first place. It doesn't hold anything back, it is harsh, ridiculous, true, false, vulgar, insane, credible, stupid, smart, inappropriate, sexy, disgusting, sincere, sarcastic etc. all at the same time. It is not any one of these things because to define it as one would never do it justice, so we label it as free because it is open to all of these things and anything else that wants poke its freak little head into the circus that it is.
In our day and age, it is so much apart of us we can't help but feel completely lost without it. We can read things (like this blog :) ) at our will because we can write things at our will. It is a constant open forum of discussion and ideas that are constantly circling the web sparking more and more ideas and discussions to systematically make its way back to us. It keeps us connected on a global level, and always gives back way more than we can take.
I understand that these bills won't completely strip us of our online freedom, but what's to stop the another, more strict, bill from passing? As a citizen to the earth, nothing is ever good enough. Give us what we want, we want more. It is all shitty, and I don't think right now that the "internet problem" is really what our focus should be on... The world's gonna end in a year people. Shouldn't we be training a group of oil drillers to stop whatever is coming our way? Focusing more of our attention and resources towards that, because truth is the Internet is not gonna be all that great if we're all too dead to enjoy it.
They only had 18 days and a young Bruce Willis. Don't get me wrong, I know he's still got it, but I don't know for how much longer, so I think we could be bit ahead of the game if only we just realized it!!!
Anyway, I hope to God our government doesn't fail us, I hope that oil-drilling team full of rough necks and hillbillies can sober up long enough just before that clock hits zero, and even more so I hope this year is great for every single one of you.
It is good to be back.
Night, Nite, Knight,
Jarrad
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)