David Freese is a Hero and The Lohan’s are not.

Greetings,

Tonight, I am ridiculously tired. I'm hoping that by writing this entry tonight I will be able to kill a massive amount of time, and then by the time it gets posted I will be able to go home and cuddle up next to my picture of Lea Michele, which I truthfully have tacked above my nightstand.  

I know many of you will be excited to know that I survived this week, the lack of the world ending, and all that other not-nearly-as-important stuff. I got through this week after spending about 10 to 12 hours in the past 2 days editing this project, which our teacher told us today is now going to be due next week...I’m not mad so please don’t think that, but I would have liked to drink last night for Charlie’s birthday instead of being in the library until 1:00AM slowly losing my mind, still questioning the mechanics of the Navi’s sex junk. Can they impregnate each other through their hair thing? Does the hair thing also get a Navi girl pregnant? It was a ripple effect.

Oh, and for those of you who are wondering what is actually going on in the IC 1st floor right now...Nothing. Absolutely nothing interesting is happening right now. I think murderers and rapists just know my shift, so they know when to stay the frick away. August, Charlie, and Sud were here (which was nice), but August and Charlie bailed and Sud’s stuff is still there, but he is nowhere to be seen... He may have died.

So you see nothing at all is happening (except the possible death of Sud). I sort of want to see someone drive through the front of the IC. I don’t want anyone to get hurt, It just would look really cool. All the glass snowing down like a twinkling winter’s night, it would be pretty.

Anyway, Game 6 of the World Series was on tonight, and I didn’t watch the whole game, but I did watch from Inning 8 on. Let me say to those of you who don’t follow sports or watch TV or do anything socially connective, the Cards brought down the house tonight. They didn’t rape, they did something much worse. They teased the Rangers with the thought of a ring. Dangled the goal right in front of them, and then David Freese smacked it 429 ft. to deep center. Although, I’ve been cheering for the Rangers, I have to say that was truly a thing of beauty. I had mad respect for Mr. Freese in the past, but that just put the cherry on top. He is officially a hometown hero, and solely responsible for my renewed faith in baseball.

After a year of a horrible fantasy squad in a league that I just didn’t recognize as home anymore, David Freese blasted me out of my baseball funk. 

So Thank You David Freese, I wish you luck in tomorrow’s game. Even though, I’m still gonna root for the Rangers and Mr. Michael Young.

UPDATE: Sud is alive and has returned to his stuff.

I would also like to bring up this whole Lohan situation, and I don’t just mean Lindsey I mean that whole family. I don’t care about you guys, please stop doing things so the media will stop flocking to you. I would compare them to something usually, but they are just so depressing and crappy that they have become the extreme shitty side in a comparison. I would use them as the low-end of a comparison now like “Your friend looks like a sick infested whore, she’s starting to look like Lindsey Lohan” or  “Your family is so messed up, they are starting to be like the Lohan’s.” So there is nothing worse then them, they literally are at the bottom of the STD infested cesspool. I guess they can be proud to be the top of shittyness in life. 

I pretty much stopped caring about Lindsey Lohan after her amazing performance in The Parent Trap, which don’t laugh, I actually truly enjoy that movie. For a kid to learn two different roles, and one in a British accent. She kills it. Plus, I like that Jakandra song “Never Let You Go,” damn good song.

That’s all for tonight, and I have two hours to go. But tomorrow...later today I’m heading to Madison where the butterbeer flows like wine and insanity consumes each and every individual in a 5 mile radius. 

Night, Nite, Knight,

Jarrad

P.S. Major props to Lance Berkman, dude with a grey beard can still swing a bat with a hefty-load of bitch-slappery.            

Halloween

Hi,

I like Halloween. That is as direct of a statement I can make. I think there is something so amazing about going out at night in my neighborhood (unsupervised!), dressing up as whatever the hell your heart can imagine, and getting lots of FREE candy. This holiday was made for Americans. Now, many of us have gotten to the point where it's not too acceptable to go out and trick-or-treat, and I definitely understand. My last year was my senior year of High School, those that look down on me, All I have to say is FREE CANDY! Regardless of my confidence, taking too many stares from disapproving mom's was bad enough, but going up to houses and getting candy from kids younger than me was almost as pathetic as the last time I willfully ate Cinnabon (which was August 20, 2010 roughly around 1:30 PM). Eric, Nate, Weston, Michael, Bruno, and Mat those were some good ass times, sorry if I left anyone else out.

If you were lucky, Halloween would fall on a Friday or Saturday, so afterwards you could have a sick-ass slumber party filled with a rousing game of Butt-Blasters and Mario Party, eventually leading into a not-at-all-homoerotic dog pile. I have to first explain what "Butt-Blasters" is because that piece of knowledge is critical to my heterosexuality.

I don't quite remember the exact rules, but the funniest and yet most disturbing part of the game involved one of us kneeling down onto our legs, so imagine the fetal position where the base of your body is resting on your calves, with their back side facing us. Then, we would take turns taking this small wooden hockey stick or ping-pong paddle (shooters choice) and smack a ping-pong ball at their butt. The hilarity ensued when you got a good shot in. Which would then be followed by 4 AM slap-happy laughing until you vomed up candy and soda. Clearly hitting things at each others butts could possibly be the funniest thing ever, of all time.

Never in my life have I ever typed that out or had to explain it, but if you didn't think we were weird as hell before, you sure do now. I am seriously questioning my normality considering other things I did when I was younger...We were in middle-school and all clothes remained on you sick perverts.

Now, Halloween has become yet another reason to get drunk and make a complete ass of yourself in a costume this time. It gives both guys and girls the equal opportunity to turn whatever sweet childhood figure, into a sexual, erotic, desirable being. They've turned Vampires and Werewolves into the sex symbols of our generation. I honestly thought they should've gone with Frankenstein and Ghouls, but I'm just thinking out loud. I seriously saw some girl skank up a Mrs. Pacman costume once, which is one of the furthest thing from sexy, unless you're regular Pacman obviously. Even then, Mrs. Pacman looks just like if regular Pacman went drag.

Still we all will eventually grow up, get respectful jobs, and become the parents pocketing flasks that we take a pull from waiting on the sidewalk while our kids head the pack of kids and then fall back to the back of the group to get seconds. I called it the two for one special, my candy intake doubled then eventually tripled when I created this little maneuver. Unlike other people's rendition of this move, I would do it on the same trip to the house, so you never had to double back, take the house for all its worth, and never look back. One time, I successfully got a woman to give me candy 5 times, and she was handing out full candy bars. It was revolutionary. My greatest con, I felt like a little Neal Caffrey. I look forward to teaching my kids these little ratty tricks.

This Halloween I will be going back to Madison, WI, where my roommate August originates from. I look forward to a night of responsible drinking and bobbing for apples, with the exciting possibility of mingling with safe friendly strangers, as well as dear old friends.

I know this post should have been for Thursday night, but I'm just gonna write it now because I can, and it was freshest on my mind. Hope your Halloweens are full of some free candy, and a whole lot of responsible intoxication.

Night, Nite, Knight,
Jarrad

Happy Birthday, End of the World, and Mel Gibson

Hello again,

I first off would like to start this post out with a intimate and devoted shout out to Mr. King David himself, Dave Kabira. Only 11 days after National Coming Out Day, Dave has a big announcement....he's coming out of the underage closet! He will be celebrating his 21st birthday along the sides of his dearest friends. He confirmed a little bit ago, that if someone drops out I will be allowed to come too, but I have to take the L by myself. Still mad fun will happen at some point this weekend.

The Rat Trap (the on-the-spot made-up name of our apartment) has been voted the hottest hangout south of the Arctic circle by Vogue, Vanity Fair, Time, Esquire, and Highlights Magazine. I personally feel blessed Highlights gave us such an intense shout-out in the page directly following their "Hidden Pictures" page...and if you didn't get that reference, then I'm truly sorry for your loss.

This upcoming week will most likely resemble the resurrection of hell on earth, so if there is any truth to this end of world crap, I'm hoping it pops off Sunday night around 2AM....I'm just kidding God, please I don't want the world to end. I'm really hoping that a good portion of mankind is wrong, and I feel like I got the past and logic on my side, so I think I should be good, but still there's that small percentage that I'm wrong. That stuff truly scares the shit out of me, not cause I'm afraid of dying, but because I don't want to go out being wrong...but really I don't want to die.

Did you guys know I can see the statistics of how many people visit this blog? I'm pretty excited with the amount of you who check this. Thank you. Even if you don't read the whole thing, I feel honored enough just to get a link click, and God knowing I would love to click any of your links any day of the week.


I really want to get into the heart of what I'm here to say. I know I mention Nello D (Fintel Diaries) a lot, but every conversation we have is a fairly good one that I feel many other people in this world would enjoy. I was talking to him a while ago about Mel Gibson, and how awesome he use to be. I know all this stuff about him has been going around since the whole Passion of the Christ ordeal, and probably some before that but I have to say I feel for the guy a little. What I'm not saying, is that I condone some of his comments he's made, but he was one of my favorite action actors to watch growing up, and I have a bit of soft spot for him. I once tweeted "If I had two gay dads I would want them to be Martin Riggs and John McClane." (Do you put something in quotes if you said it?) Well, this is completely true, those of you who don't know who that is: Martin Riggs: Mel Gibson in Lethal Weapon movies and John McClane: Bruce Willis in Die Hard movies. Those two guys were awesome, they were quintessential insane bad asses, and epidimity of the crazy cool, and I loved it. Some of you who may know me, know that I grew up idolizing Danny Zuko, The Fonz and Uncle Jesse and that's very true. However, these two guys catered to a different side of me, we need the insanity as much as the sanity. 

I not asking much, just read through some of Mel Gibson's quotes on his IMDB trivia page, and maybe you'll see that guy that we have seen in some pretty poor moments (very very poor moments) is most likely insane, but also human.

And if my Number 1: Robert Downey Jr. aka RDJ aka my bees knees can stand by him, I don't have a problem doing it either.

That's all for tonight. Thanks again for not only being a statistic, but a dear friend that is just a number to me on Facebook or Twitter. Love you all.

Night, Nite, Knight,
Jarrad

P.S. Ms. Al Paul Happy Birthday you are now officially irrelevant...welcome to the club.

This Place Blows Some Times.

Greetings all 4 of you,

Welcome back!

As I sit here at the far left (you're right from the front door) side of the IC front desk, I feel an overwhelming sense of boredom. I am currently trying to finish a wonderful Communication & Ethics paper dealing with the Ethical Question: Was Shephard Fairey ethical in taking "the AP" (really Mannie Garcia's) photo of Barack Obama and turning into that Iconic "HOPE" image that at this point we are all a little sick of. Sort of like those "I <3 NY" shirts or anything having to do with The Beatles or any piece of art Andy Warhol ever made.

The answer is: I really just don't care. Ethically or unethically it doesn't matter to me, because truthfully papers like this you end up worrying more about plagiarizing (which is unethical, by the way) then the content of the paper. This class gives me a headache in places in my head I don't think I even knew I had because there was never any feeling there. I realize this is a definite shit on myself and intelligence, but truth is I feel a lot dumber/lazier after leaving this class. It seems to be that the harder the assignment is, the more likely I am to put it off until the last minute. I jump at the chance for busy work, I get that done weeks in advance.

Now, if anyone in my family is reading this, (Linda, Amber, Dean, etc.) don't worry I'm still going to get my work done...Please don't tell Dad. All I need now, is my father, Mr. Q-U-A-D for David-I-R, calling me up and telling me that I need to focus on my studies and kick ass. I've pissed him off enough in 22 years, he can take a break for a while.

Doing this assignment has been a giant wake-up call to just how shitty people can be in this world. I was just talking to my roommate Nello (The Fintel Diaries) the other day while we were watching Liar, Liar about how crappy people are, and how screwed up our Judicial system is. Now, I know this is nothing new to anyone who's been alive for more than 5 seconds, but still I had to say it. People are pretty crappy sometimes, does anyone remember when that Wal-Mart employee was stomped to death on Black Friday a couple years ago, because a couple hundred crazy ass hicks who can't feed their kids, but want to buy a "cheap" big screen couldn't be civilized enough getting into a store with pretending it's Monster Truck season. Because God knows a flat screen is far more important than a human's life. Not only that, the dude died in a Wal-Mart as their employee, and I bet the first thing they thought of was the lawsuit that they were gonna get because he was their employee and died in their store, not that he had a family or anything or that he just gave up his life for possibly the most pathetic reason on earth. People make you sad in a lot of ways, I may be acting cynical, but I know they have to capacity to be good, so in that respect I got some empty optimism.

and yes, Liar, Liar sparks many deep thoughtful discussions. If more people took the time to analyze it, it would literally rock the frack out of their worlds. Jim Carrey in general, The movies he has been in have dealt with some pretty pressing issues: Fun with Dick and Jane- unemployment, poverty, and social hierarchy, Ace Ventura 1 & 2- animal rights, animal cruelty, Bruce Almighty- faith, spirituality, religion, and love, Liar,Liar- true interpretation of our country's legal system, family problems, and love, The Mask- self-confidence, the out-going person we all wish to be (not just drunk), Dumb and Dumber- youth, ignorance, and the innocent child in all of us, and Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind- heartbreak, love, and relationships, Cable Guy-media control, family problems, and creepy friends, and I Love You, Philip Morris- gay rights, gay community, Gay all the Way!

I learned how to live from Jim Carrey movies, I suggest you start to do the same. Argue with it. I dare you.

I really just want to spend a whole post talking about this, but I feel if I don't limit myself I may go on rant that will never end, and on this topic that would probably be a good thing. To Jamey Rodemeyer and Jamie Hubley, in the words of President Josiah Bartlett (Martin Sheen) from the West Wing, "The streets of heaven are too crowded with angels tonight." I'm truly sorry that you guys couldn't take it anymore, I never could imagine what that must have been like for you, or any other gay teen out there struggling with the same thing. Life truly blows sometimes.

To the bullies out, you get my Fuck You of a lifetime, and I know that's bullying, but I honestly don't give a shit. People's lives are not trivial, just stop.

Mad kudos to Zachary Quinto for coming out of the closet to set an example.

That's all for tonight because, I actually have to do this paper enough to justify saving it until 11:45 PM Thursday night to finish before the 12 AM due date.

Night, Nite, Knight,
Jarrad

Nostalgia and Other Weird Feelings

Greetings All,

This is officially my second post, and I can already feel my hands hating me from immense amount of time they spend touching a keyboard. If you also thought that sounded a little dirty, you're not alone.

BREAKING NEWS:
 The Fintel Diaries is officially back today, Oct. 14th! hopefully by the time I post this it will be updated, but I'm not making any promises, more so because I know Chris, and his all-star flappery...and Tuna this is what I was talking about.

As this weekends festivities of little to absolutely no productiveness and a whole lot of "fading into darkness" ended, there was a small glimmer of the true beauty that we find so rarely in this world. Christopher Michael DiNello is officially 21! That actually happened 2 days ago, but we don't need to be burdened by that insignificant reality. The kid, that no one thought would ever make it past that tender age of 18, has grown into a slimmer, more confident, sexier, larger kid. Good for you Nello D. As we celebrate his last final relevant birthday this weekend, I'm sure that he will not only look back on his life and think about the vast amount of wasted time, but also about the good times, the small victories, and great memories he will forever have to cherish. In these times of self-reflecting and growing (or for some, lack there of), it's important to understand the power of nostalgia, and all of that bitch feeling, that comes along with it.

As I seamlessly and may I say beautifully transition into this idea of nostalgia, I have to first start off by telling you what I've been doing in the past few weeks. As many of you probably know, and those of you who don't  I don't really care, but Netflix sort of blows. I mean that with no due respect possible. That doesn't mean that I don't use it quite often, I'm just saying they've really done a fantastic job pissing off their customers, which when you're in the business of selling a product, I feel that's sort of... in some ways...not doing what you're suppose to be doing. I don't honestly know, there is a reason I chose film to be my major, and not business. However, Netflix recently has been upping their infamous "Instant Stream," usually cluttered with straight to DVD National Lampoon comedies that middle-schoolers and I just love to watch for the amazing jokes and completely necessary nudity scenes that we never really see coming. Some recently new additions have been Breaking Bad, Mad Men, Mighty Morphin Power Rangers (Yes, this is not a dream), The Fighter, and the one I'm about to focus heavily on, The Wonder Years.

Those of you who don't know what The Wonder Years is then please walk into on-coming traffic, and ask someone to pull over and explain it to you, because chances are if they can drive they know what it is... I sure am clever, not mean and violent. If not, then I'll break it down for you right quick. This kid, Kevin Arnold, and his two bestee's, one with testess, one without (Winnie Cooper and Paul Pfeiffer) grow up in the late 1960's early 70's as young adolescents in this coming-of-age rom-com show, as they strive to hold onto their childhood while discovering what it means to grow up.

This show makes me cry, pretty much hourly. Not every episode has got a deep message, but every show in some ways you can definitely relate to. Which, you would think would be weird, considering it takes place in the 1960's and 70's and I wasn't born until '89. Periods of life not far in time, but far in change. Regardless, I still seem to take a little something with me with each episode. Nostalgia is a pretty damn good word to use when describing the feeling of this show, It makes you think about things you may have forgotten. However, I have to say Kevin Arnold can be one of the most whiny little bitches on the face of the earth, which I don't think I realized when I was younger watching that show. Maybe, because around the time I was watching it, I was too that whiny little bitch. Still, this show makes me feel good, bad, sad, angry, depressed and I highly recommend everyone and anyone to watch it. It's sort of like anytime I watch Armageddon, I kid you not, I know Harry is going to die, and still I can't freaking believe it. Does anyone else still believe that Bruce Willis died for our sins? Cause I'm not so sure he didn't.

As I so abruptly and not beautifully transition into my next piece of  nostalgic text, I just want to say that I've been reading. Weird for me, I know, but true. Last time I posted for this blog I did it between reading breaks of my favorite book, Catcher in the Rye. By favorite book, I mean that I was able to read the whole thing through without even considering Sparknoting it once. I finally get why, I don't really like Holden Caulfield, I understand him, I think he makes sense in a bullshit kind of way, but I don't really like him. I think he's the part of ourselves we love to hate though. We need that person in us, to know what's shitty, so we can eventually remember what's great. Still this book, makes me go through my "Armageddon-Mood-Swings," very similarly to the Wonder Years. Although, I don't think I'm as cynical as Holden Caulfield, and truth is he's not as cynical as he wants you to believe, but I do think I believe him, and I think in a lot of ways I was as scared as he was about his life. Obviously not for the same reasons, but I could relate in my own way. I have to say to all those phonies out there, keep on doing what you're doing because we need you just as much as the cynical assholes.

I'm not gonna dwell much more on nostalgia and the bitch of growing up, but as I fear the world that might lay in front of me, it's nice to remember. As Kevin Arnold once said, "Ours is a world to careless with its memories." or as Holden Caulfield and I usually do if we don't know what else to do, just cry.

I'm not gonna write much more. I just really want to talk briefly about Drive. Gosling or as we like to call him now "The Sling," this guy can act and be handsome at the same time, and that movie was like a finely tuned car, if ya catch my connection. This movie is mind-blowingly great. James Records told me, that he left that movie feeling different, a feeling that he said he hasn't felt in a long time after leaving a movie. I can concur with that, after just watching it the other day.

If you haven't seen it, go see it. It's worth it, there's some gore, but nothing that our desensitized minds can't handle. One scene there's boobs and gore, which is sort of cool, but I had a hard time watching that part even with the boobs, the gore is over fairly quickly though.

That soundtrack is perfect. It's been playing on the reg in the "Rat Trap"aka our apartment. This has been very long, sorry If I kept you. Hope all your days are filled with nostalgia, gore, and boobs.

Night, Nite, Knight,
Jarrad

P.S. UPDATE: Nello said the post should be in around 6, not sure if that's at night or morning, but check at some point today.

The Calling

For those of you who think this is going to be about that early 2000's "rock" band "The Calling," who sang that song about "Our Lives," then just stop reading now. That post will happen much later. 

I'm Jarrad, a senior at Loyola University Chicago. I work the night shift (1:45 AM-7:00AM) a few days a week at our school's Information Commons aka our giant glass computer lab. I got my calling, after applying for this job, out of desperation due to lack of money. It's a nice job, because believe it or not the IC isn't that high in demand in the wee hours of the morning. Regardless, someone has to sit here and make sure that our students/my fellow peers are protected from any crazed homeless man, or possible drunk brosef looking for a warm place to start a ruckus and defecate on some campus computers. Well, I'm that guy, not flying solo, but definitely flying high!

I have given us (late night workers) a name, a name that I birthed during my awkward middle school days after thinking I was cool because I walked to Chipotle after school. They are some, they are mediocre, they are the Eastgate Night Hawks!!! I am no Night Hawk, I kid myself not. I believe in myself and all, but I'm not gonna sit here and tell you that I have what it takes to be a Night Hawk. People give shit to these "Mall Cops," but truth is I don't think I can do that job. I don't have the guts to walk around like that, knowing that people think down on me, because I'm a "fake" cop. Well, I want any Night Hawks out there who may read this know, that you've got one supporter. I have full faith in you guys, and at times model my own nightly shift duties after you. Anyway, we will be known as... The Knight Rangers- protecting people without them even knowing it. Sort of like the end of the Dark Knight when Gordon is going off on that long monologue of how Batman is the "watchful protector," it also combines four of my favorite childhood/ young adult memories. 1.)Walker Texas Ranger 2.) The Power Rangers 3.) The Dark Knight and of course 4.) Black Knight.

On occasion I like to walk over to kids, and maybe make a joke their way about their late night study habits, just trying to put them at ease, "Hey, this guy's got a sense of humor...at 4 in the morning, and how clever, witty, yet demanding and authoritative, and OH! how much he looks like John Stamos really makes my heart race." What a wonderful feeling that must be for them. I also like to walk around the first floor like I own the place. Regardless, of the 3 weeks I've been here, I demand order on my floor of the IC.

I decided to write this blog, not out of pure exciting happenings of the late night IC, but more so out of sheer unrelenting boredom. It's nice to chronicle your thoughts, and actions of any given time. Something that's more personal and goes beyond the shallow walls of Twitter or Facebook, although those are nice too.

I have to admit, I wouldn't have the courage to do such a thing without the selfless acts and fearless efforts of one my loved and admired friends and roommates, Chris DiNello aka Nello D. His first Chronicled action was when he started the Pulitzer Prize winning blog the Fintel Diaries. He went out and simply put his thoughts into words, and may I say he did it eloquently and beautifully never once sacrificing himself for anything or anyone who told him other wise. Check it out, it's hot as hell, even though he hasn't updated it in a while.

GOSSIP UPDATE: Word is around the old apartment, that the Fintel Diaries will be having it's first official update after almost 11 months of being on hiatus.

Anyway, as brave as that was, it wasn't until just recently that he inspired me most. Recently, Chris has been reading personal journal entries (actual writing) out loud, not just to his roommates, but other friends and acquaintances. His deepest most personal thoughts in the world, about his life, friends, and family all tied into one. He holds almost nothing back, and leaves his heart on the table at the end of the day. I must say Bravo! to that sir. You are truly an open book, and a lesson to us all. Hold nothing back, and the world is yours...sort of.

So I would like to dedicate this blog to him, myself, and anyone else who has to sit on the internet for 5 hours and 15 minutes a night, and keep the Google safe search switched to "ON." Appropriate web surfing has never been so hard.

-Night, Nite, Knight,
Jarrad